May 8, 2012
Now that competition season is over, the rush is going full steam ahead to dance recital. Can I somehow get off this costume train????? I need a little costume fairy, preferably someone who loves to tend to details and tiny pieces to tend to about a million costumes for recital!!
I mean really, it's pack the costumes, febreeze the costumes, repack the costumes! Remember to put the nude bras in the first one of the day....but that one doesn't need to have the straps, so put the straps into the costumes that needs them. And remember to add safety pins to the plastic hooks because we can't possibly have a wardrobe malfunction onstage to embarrass us! And then some costumes need tan tights and black fishnets....some with seams and some without seams.....you know, who cares if the stockings have seams....you just have to make sure they are straight anyway! And how come there is ALWAYS one rhinestone that is missing on the seams just when you are about to go onstage to dance? Do rhinestones go on vacations? If so, I seriously need to know where they go....I'll send my little costume fairy to collect all the ones that belong on our fishnets! Other costumes have gloves, and you know, why are the fingers ALWAYS inside out when it comes time to put them on in a hurry? What little mean troll turns those tiny finger holes inside out to torture a wardrobe mom? Whoever you are, you deserve to be banned to wardrobe glove prison turning little fingers right side out for hours every day...just saying! And have you ever tried to put gloves on a sweaty hand from dancing in a hurry....it would be easier to build a skyscraper all by yourself! Ballet tutus have to be hung upside down from the crotch so the skirt stays puffy, and you have to have pink tights with them....jazz costumes usually have tan tights. Jazz can have either tan or black jazz shoes....another problem for moms....what if the kids have tan shoes, but need black ones for the one costume....back to the store and $50 later....TADA...black jazz shoes, which the kids hate to wear anyway...they prefer just one knee sock. Guess that's not the in thing for recital though! And who is the guy who likes to cut holes in the toes of dance shoes just before recital EVERY year....I really need to have a major discussion with you! If I buy shoes right before recital, then they are to small at the beginning of the dance season in the fall....can we somehow reach a compromise here? Maybe I could lead you out to the outgrown dance shoe vault in the garage and you could demolish a pair or two and leave the ones they actually are wearing alone.....please? And don't even get me started on the shoe selection...we own 2 pairs of ballet shoes, two pairs flat black tap shoes, one pair black tap heels, one pair tan flat tap shoes. We have foot paws x 2 and foot undies x 2, and the the black and tan jazz shoes x 2! We have pointe shoes, and character shoes, and lyrical shoes! We don't have hip hop shoes...guess we don't have much swagger! I can fill up my entire kitchen counter with smelly dance shoes! And you have to pack them in the first costume, and then when the kids are frantically changing, you have to remember what the next costume that needs them is and put them in the costume bag with that costume. My worst nightmare is the shoe quick change in 8 beats in the middle of the dance. Can you just see me crouching down in the wings of the stage with the shoes untied and open wide ready to stuff a foot in and tie while the kids put on the other shoe? You know it just wouldn't do for them to dance with one shoe on and one shoe off...I mean, really, how embarrassing! (Yes, I need a very large list taped to the front of each costume bag that says what shoes, what tights, how the hair is styled (more regarding this in the next paragraph) where pins are needed, and what accessories are being used. My list comes in handy when the girls can't remember what the name of the next dance is too. And they don't have time to help put stuff away anyway when they only have a couple of dances to totally change their costume. Can you just see me backstage in a hot dressing room, costume bags hung all around me, costume parts all over counter and floor, and those blasted dance shoes EVERYWHERE? It's enough to make a mom have a nervous breakdown right there backstage, EXCEPT we have to suck it up and be the stage mom until after every dance is done and all the costumes are repacked but smelly, and we have bribed Dad to carry everything back to the van that is parked somewhere in the next county! There are also the hairstyles that need quick changes. For competition we use a right side french braid tied into a leftside low bun. OK, but do you know how many times you can mess up a french braid when you are trying to hold a million strands of hair all in your hand at once and not mix up the strands...AND you are trying to do it while the kid is saying, hurry mom, hurry mom, and you know that as soon as they dance this one dance, you have to take everything out and make just a plain pony tail. Then just when you think you can wash the hair gel and hairspray off you hands, you discover that the next dance needs that ponytail redone into a low center bun. And just to make things a bit more complicated, multiply this times 2 for each hairstyle! Now can you see me quietly wimpering in the corner behind the costume rack? Did you know that hairnets have legs, and they like to run away very fast between the time you take them out of the package and make a ponytail to put the hairnet around to make a bun? Those little suckers could win the Olympics with their speed record for quick escapes! Maybe they don't like the hairpins being stuck into them, or the bobby pins squishing them, or heaven knows they must hate all the hair gel and hairspray! But come on, it's nigh unto impossible to unpack another hairnet while holding onto a bun that isn't anchored down because it doesn't have a HAIRNET!!!! Then if you try to make Cymbre a ponytail and a bun you have to attach fake hair to her, and that's a whole issue by itself! And the thing that really will make a mom go crazy is the constant changing of accessories.... necklaces, earrings, and hair pieces, and hats. Purple earrings, pink earrings, a ring for a finger, chokers, ribbon chokers, rhinestoned bobby pins, hairbows, miniature hats, black gloves, black half gloves, arm bands, belts, feathers...you name it the girls have had to wear it! And the benefit of all this costume stuff is you get to stand in the wings of the stage and watch the entire show from the back.....no wonder I make the back of the costume just as fancy as the front....it's the only part I see! AND, you get to start stripping the kid down as they come off stage for the quick changes in costumes that are always looming just out of sight! Have you ever tried to undress a dancer who is running to the dressing room, while holding costume parts and sticking bobby pins in your mouth, and unhooking costumes or safety pins? Talk about multi-tasking!
But the best part of all this is just watching the girls dance from the wings, having watched all the hours of practice and work. By then we've paid for and made all the costumes, glued all the rhinestone, made all the hats and hairpieces, replaced the fishnets that got holes, and used about 10 gallons of Febreeze! To see them pull of a perfect performance ALWAYS brings the tears to my eyes, and that further complicates the costume changes....sort of hard to see with tears brimming at the corners of your eyes. You just stand there in amazement at the talent they have and their ability to use it to the delight of others. How proud their Heavenly Father must be of how they have multiplied their talents He sent them down here to earth to develop! Now if He would just throw a little cash into the till....everyone would be happy! Just saying!
And on that note.....I must go to the store and buy about 5 gallons of Febreeze to take to recital to freshen up these costumes! I'm going to get a new flavor...somthing for my nose to enjoy amongst the sweaty, smelly costumes and shoes backstage during recital.....you know, right before I hide myself in the far back corner and take a well-needed NAP!!! Maybe Dad will pull the van up from the next county and carry me to the car when he finally gets all the costumes loaded....what do you think Guy? Guy? I know you are here somewhere.....
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